“Second single” is what I’ve called this time of my life, and let me tell you, it’s pretty awesome.
In the 20s and earlier 30s, I used to feel a lot of pressure to ditch my singlehood and get married. I was so single that people didn’t even bother to give me a “plus one” at weddings. I still held my singleness like a badge of honor, but I did feel a bit of shame to be in my “marrying stage” and not be partnered up.
Then I partnered up for a few years, got married (oops) and now I’m a month away from divorce… and I couldn’t be more happy to be back to single, both in my heart and on paper.
Second single is an amazing stage in life. I’ve allowed myself this time to BREATHE and just be ME again. Dating is a lot of fun – I’ve been having maybe too much fun with some amazing people – but the lads that come into my life know where I stand in terms of protecting my singlehood. Friendships are #1 in this stage of life, especially with the ones who are in a similar stage as I am. Career and entrepreneurship fuels my fire again, but the difference this time, is that everything is on my terms. I’m free.
The pressure to partner up is gone — been there, done that — because I know how much stronger I am standing on my own two feet. Divorce has made me bitter, but it hasn’t made me give up on love, and I know that when the time/person is right, it could happen again…
But for now, it’s just me and Roky, and I wouldn’t change a thing about it.